I hope I never stop chasing everything I have hoped and envisioned myself to be as a person. It is easier said than done to always want to be the better person in times of anger, distrust and sadness. Some people achieve great things, they get a great career, but what is the point of achieving all of this when you disregard relationships at such a cost?
My Godma told me today, “Some people are afraid to leave a relationship, because they are afraid of starting over again. It’s too tiring, to start from scratch.”
“I hope you don’t think I’m that sort of person.” I said.
“I know, you aren’t that kind of person.” She replied, leaving me smiling from ear to ear. “Headstrong”.
Priorities may change along the way but I hope I never lose sight of what is really important. May I never cease putting my relationships to the people I love above my success in a career.
There was a time where I didn’t enjoy birthdays too much. Mainly because of the constant disappointments in life. Since then, I’ve adopted an approach of little expectation, little disappointment. It was hard to understand why I felt that way though, I never understood why till I grew older. It was difficult to admit that my birthday meant a lot to me.
However, as life left me completely dumbfounded, I began to grow into my shoes as a young adult. Aduting was something completely new to me, as I struggled to understand insurance, bills, taxes, giving back to your parents, social obligations and so on and so forth. Being open was something I learnt to deal with as time went by. Last week, I turned 24 on the 24th.
This year, I realized how I have been molded in so many ways through the friendships and people I have met over the last few years. I was extremely blessed and showered with so much love leading up to it that even I lost track of time.
Growing old is always a blessing and a privilege that not everyone gets to enjoy. Thank you Jesus for the wonderful 365 days of being 23, and for the selfless people in my life.
Birthday Wish from KL (2016)
Birthday Wish from Auntie Socks, leaving me chuckling #forever21 #iproclaimthisinofficeallthetime
Birthday Wish from Betty #i’molderthannintendo64 #gasp
♥ ❤ ❥ ♥ ❤ ❥Thank you everyone who made this day amazing. I love you all ♥ ❤ ❥ ♥ ❤ ❥ ♥ ❤
My takeaway of the week: people can only treasure the meaning of a fleeting moment when that moment becomes a memory. With the busy week that has just gone by, only to be replaced with an even busier week- I can’t help but feel the pressure on me. With work, school and its upcoming exams, I barely seem to have time for the people around me. I’m so glad that the ones who are close by though, are still extremely supportive to attune their schedule to mine (which I’m really grateful for, of course).
Recently, I’ll be honest to say that I’ve not been having my usual great days. Thursday was the worst for me this week, I came back drained, really upset and worse still, I (think) I chose to displace my anger the unhealthy way- leading to a terrible argument (which now has been, thankfully, resolved) with my loved ones.
Thursday was a terrible day, and although the situation wasn’t my intention or fault, I was yelled and told off harshly at which didn’t help. I stood my ground, but eventually standing my ground had my arm twisted again and made me look wrong. However, upon closer reflection- this reminded me that even if your voice quivers, speak the truth. Even if it hurts. Sometimes all I wish is for some teamwork and cooperation, a little peace and acknowledgement that I’m doing something right. As for what intentions I have in my heart, it is my heart. Not yours. I think with time, I’ll learn to put my feelings aside and not take things personally, especially if the statement was hurtful.
Also, Happy Mother’s day to the mother who drives me crazy but I adore to bits. You have done so much for me growing up and though sometimes we don’t see eye to eye, I know you have tried everything in your capacity to be strong for me. Love you!
On a whole other note: totally relating to Taylor Swift’s pretty old song, out of the woods.