There are moments in a person’s life that make you reconsider every single choice you’ve made in your life. Though these moments are rare, they can provoke you to make soul crushing decisions. The most notable but highly underrated experience is: your first heartbreak. It could have been your childhood sweetheart; a person you just met but had impeccable chemistry with or even a fellow co-worker whose interest you never took seriously. If you’re lucky, your first love will not disappoint you. But if you fall under the vast majority, that one crushing moment will feel like it will never leave you, even when the person already has.
You think that you’re not ready for life, that you’re stuck between the limbo of never getting better or Maybe-I’m-getting-better phase through I’m-over-it curveballs. This is when life will surprise you. Life will shake you, wake you. This is when your second love appears.
I don’t think you ever notice when they appear. You never imagined the depth of their presence, how thinly cut the chances of time or coincidence are to have led to your paths crossing.
You never take into consideration how important they would be in the hours, days, months or years to come. That their love is one which slowly seeps into your skin, as you lay on the brink of uncertainties of maybes. The constant fear of them leaving is expected, as you convince yourself that it’d just be better if they left sooner than later.
Your second love will never be like your first. You know in theory that this is true, but with the start of something new, it feels like you can never be sure if you’ve really put the past behind you. In the beginning, you are making mental notes of the way they said things differently, of how they talked differently, or how they showed their love differently.
You were accustomed to the way your first showed you how to love, but you need to embrace being taught a completely different kind of love. This is the one that refreshes and invigorates your drawn and tired soul.
The old paths begin to converge with the new, and though the history stays the same, the future yields the change you had so badly yearned for in the beginning but never expected to have. Not in your wildest dreams.
Your second love will reassure you of their conscious choice to choose you. They will come up with the most logical, practical and heart felt reasons why they will choose you over and over again in a heartbeat. They will accept your past, that you, wide-eyed with eyes full of wonder, fell in love the first time because it required no past experience to remind you of the pain of a fall. They will watch you fall asleep and remind you to be courageous for yourself, to fend for yourself against your past demons. They hope that you would trust them, because they know without trust that this love cannot stand.
Your second love will help you understand the profundity of love and that it is an ability that every human being is able to exercise. They will stay through the fights and the tears. Most importantly, when they come so unexpectedly, it is when you realize why it never worked with anyone else.